


Harlee Crap I'm In An Alternate Universe

by ShipperTrash140109



Series: Harlee Crap [1]
Category: Actor RPF, Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018) Actor RPF, British Actor RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Domestic Fluff, M/M, Married Life, ben wakes up in a different universe, mazlek is in chapters 2 3 and 7, they have a heckin kid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-04
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-22 05:55:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17657183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShipperTrash140109/pseuds/ShipperTrash140109
Summary: It wasn’t unusual for Frankie to wake Ben up with a faceful of kissesBut it was unusual for them to be so neat and and…bristly…akaBen wakes up in a different universe, in a reality where he's married to Gwil with a son and a dog called Frankie that definitely isn't Frankie.He's a little confused.





	1. I Had A Dream

**Author's Note:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> okay, welcome to my next multi-chapter project, this is probably going to be under 10 chapters, and I hope y'all enjoy, because i sure had a lot of fun writing it!
> 
> Also a warning for later in the chapter,I don't know how to write children 😖

It wasn’t unusual for Frankie to wake Ben up with a faceful of kisses

But it was unusual for them to be so neat and and…bristly…

Ben furrowed his brow, pushing back against the weight pressing against him, except instead of touching short, soft fur, he pressed his hand to-

“Gwil, what the fuck?” the blond was flying up straight and leaping to the other side of the bed in seconds, sticking his hands out away from him, eyes glued to the concerned and VERY FUCKING NAKED Gwilym Lee. Surely, he hadn’t- he couldn’t of… how the hell?

Maybe in another universe this wouldn’t have been strange, but Ben remembers going to bed last night in his huge, lonely house, cuddled up to Frankie- not whatever gargantuan fluffy monstrosity was sitting at the foot of the bed looking at him. He also definitely didn’t fall asleep with his goddamn dream man tucked against his side.

“Ben, are you alright love? Did you have a nightmare or something?” Gwil’s slowly shifting closer to him now, a hesitant hand reaching out to grasp Ben’s wrist. The blond is confused and bordering on scared, where the hell is Frankie and how in the fucking world did he end up here. Is this a joke? Did Joe or Allen kidnap him or something? Ben knew Joe was aware of his crush but surely the red-head wasn’t that fucking sick?

“What are you… Why are you?” the blond pulled his hand away, eyes flying around the room, this is not his house, and that is not his dog, and the ring on his finger is not his. Something very strange was afoot.

“What do you mean? Love, you’re kind of worrying me now” Ben was about to accuse him of being in on some dastardly plan when their eyes finally met. Those were not the eyes of man in on some sort of practical joke, and a part of Ben thought he’d prefer it if they were.

Ben excused himself to try and find the bathroom, pulling on some soft pyjama shorts and a sweater on as he went- thankfully there was an en suite so the task was so much easier. He could hear Gwil beckoning him back, but the blond thought his head would explode if he didn’t extract himself. Leaning against the sink, Ben leans down, splashing water over his face and praying that he looks back up to find himself back in his own house, but alas, it of course wasn’t that easy.

He remained in the bathroom for lord knows how long, trying to formulate an explanation for what the actual hell was happening, during these long, confusing moments, Gwil remained on the other side of the door, knocking softly. Trying to tempt Ben out with gentle words, the blond feels his heart twang in his chest, how he wished this was real, to be able to go out and melt into Gwil’s arms knowing it wasn’t some dream or hallucination.

But minutes passed, and he remained there, he wasn’t waking up, and Ben couldn’t tell if he was relieved or scared. The blond drew in a long breath, before opening the door, barely able to blink before he’s being smothered (by a mercifully clothed Gwilym), Gwil’s arms around him and mouth against his, Ben was frozen against the taller male, his brain in complete shutdown, was this heaven?

Gwil was exactly what Ben had thought he’d be, soft and skilled and way too genuine, his hands were firm and soothing pressed to his hips, thumbs running over the thinly clothed skin. Gwil’s beard scratched at Ben’s cheeks and chin as he hesitantly kissed back (because who knows how much longer this is going to last- whatever ‘this’ was).

They pulled away after what was, in Ben’s opinion, a few ridiculously fast seconds, Gwil leaning down to press his forehead to the blonds. The shorter male found it incredibly difficult not to look away from those powerful blue eyes, staring into his soul and turning his insides into outsides. “You alright now? If this is about Harley- he’s gonna be fine darlin’ he’s so excited, could hardly get him to sleep last night, and I know he’s gonna want his dad to give him a big smile when we drop him off.”

**_What._ **

“H-Harley?”

Gwil pulled back, sliding his hands from Ben’s hips to his biceps, he looked confused and Ben felt so damn stupid right now (even though he had a great many multitudes of reason to be confused in the fucking first place). “Yeah, Harley, he should be up soon. I know you’re worried, but you just need to accept it, your boy’s growing up… c’mon, we should get breakfast started,” Ben could only open and close his mouth like a confused goldfish as Gwil presses a kiss to the crown of his head, before releasing him and heading for the door, calling ‘Frankie’ to him. The blond and white dog huffing excitedly, leaping off the bed and following after Gwilym, tail high and moving a mile a minute.

Ben ran his hands over his face, what the actual fuck?

He’s quick to pursue Gwil, deciding to just try and go with the flow, last it out and enjoy it as much as possible. The blond allowing himself to grin to himself a moment, this definitely isn’t the worst dream he’s ever had.

Finding his way to the kitchen, Ben is greeted with quite the picture, one that has his heart aching painfully- a mirage, a dream that’ll disappear if he gets too close. Gwil is bent over the counter, preparing what looks to be pancakes, an honest to god apron tied around him (though it’s a bit short on him, and there’s little string to spare- obviously a woman’s make and not exactly designed to fit all 6’2 of Gwilym Lee.

Frankie is sitting by his feet, her rose-shaped blond ears pricked, eyes wide and pleading for any titbit’s that may find their way off the counter. Ben bites back a smile as he makes his way to a stool at the island, a coffee quickly finding its way in front of him, the glint of his ring catching his eye as Ben reaches out to grab the mug.

Pausing mid reach, Ben pulls back and holds the ring-clad hand in front of his face, eyeing the simple gold band. He swallows thickly, his lungs suddenly empty and throat tight, this wasn’t real, and it almost brought tears to his eyes. The blond sniffles, disguising the sound as him fighting off a sneeze into the fabric of a sweater he’s never worn or seen before this moment.

They sit there in companionable silence, Gwil cooking away and Ben trying to note every detail of this Gwil’s face, the easy smile, the way his eyes turn soft whenever he looks up to see Ben staring at him, the goddamn ring on his finger. It’s almost too much.

Ben is confused a moment when Gwilym looks up and smiles at something behind him, but it’s when the blond turns to see what he’s looking at that it all becomes a bit real for a moment.

“Here’s the man of the hour, look at you, all dressed up. I made you some pancakes!” Gwil’s voice rises three octaves as he rounds the kitchen to approach the tired but determined looking five-year-old standing at the entrance to the room. He happily accepts Gwil scooping him up into his arms, and Ben feels like his brain’s about to kick the bucket.

He’s married to Gwil,  
and they have a bloody kid.


	2. A Dream Of Sweet Illusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley's first day at school

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> first off, thank you so much for all your comments, they made writing this chapter 390% easier and your lovely comments are half the reason i can post everyday so thank you so much. I hope this chapter is as good as the first, again a extend a forewarning; i am terrible at writing kids 😫

All throughout breakfast, Ben can’t look away from Harley, can’t tear his eyes from the kid that looks so much like he and Gwilym (except for his bright swath of orange-gold hair), and seeing his ‘husband’ cutting up his pancakes and pushing his chair in for him is like a kick to the guts. He suspects that Gwil has probably noticed the near obsessive staring by this point, but the brunet doesn’t mention it. Ben has no idea how to act around this kid- his kid, he’s not dad material, he’s not ready for this, even if it was only for a short time, he wasn’t cut out for this.

It only became painfully more obvious as the morning continued, that Gwilym was made to be a parent, and that Harley absolutely adored him. After breakfast, the two make their way up to Harley’s room to get all his things together, the young boy a lot more energetic with food in his belly. He’s got Ben and Gwil’s hand’s in either of his, and thanks to one of his dad’s height, as they move up the stairs, Harley spends more time with his feet off the ground than on it. Frankie tears past them, rocketing up and towards where Ben’s assumes the boy’s room is, he runs his thumb over the soft skin of Harley’s hand, helping him up and over the last few steps before letting Gwil and the little ginger lead him to the room.

Upon entering, Ben feels like he’s just stepped into wonderland, it’s a whole life put out in front of him, there’s pictures from all stages of Harley’s life around the room, most featuring him with either Gwil or Ben. The blond can faintly hear Gwil talking to Harley about what he needs for the first day, but he’s much too distracted by all the pictures and mementos. Ben pauses in front of a picture sat in possibly the fanciest frames he’s ever seen in his life, it’s a picture of the three of them, probably a year or so ago given how Harley looks a fair bit more grown up now. Ben and Gwilym are crouching either side of him, Ben’s arm wrapped around the beaming little boy and Gwil’s slung over the blond’s shoulders. In Harley’s little hands he holds a laminated piece of paper declaring his graduation from kindergarten, on his head sits a black cardboard graduation cap, a stark contrast to the hair that’s vibrant even in the photo.

Ben feels a pang of longing, wishing he’d been there, wishing he could’ve somehow experienced something like that with the other two. Taking in all the details, stamping the looks on their faces into his mind, he moves to the next frame, this one smaller, and featuring a picture of Gwil and Harley, the little boy likely only a couple years old and sat a top the brunet’s shoulders, face split with a giant grin as he laughs, little hands gripping handfuls of dark hair. They seemed to be at a fair of some sort, as Ben can see a Ferris wheel and multiple colourful stalls behind them, and he feels a jab of jealousy flash through him, jealousy that chews at his insides and makes him feel nothing but seething anger at whomever gets to live this reality every day.

He comes across another picture, this one really peaking his attention, it’s a wide one, and in it stands Gwil, Ben, Harley, Rami, Joe, and a little girl with dark brown hair (but given the fact that she’s standing between them, with both hands holding theirs- Ben has a sneaking suspicion she may be their daughter- because Ben’s sure anything is possible at this point). In the photo, whilst the girl is grinning cheekily into the camera, her head tilted slightly to the side and standing on her tip toes, Harley is much younger, and sat safely in Gwil’s arms, his little forelimbs wrapped around his dad’s neck, face taken up by a huge grin, eyes nearly squeezed shut.

Ben finds himself looking back to the girl, and then to the two men either side of her, Joe and Rami… considering the fact that Rami and Lucy were very much in love when he’d last checked, this photo had completely spun his world upside down, what a strange reality this was. Turning back around, Ben finds Gwil still packing things into Harley’s bag, the little ginger having lost interest and turned to trying to hug Frankie, the blond collie having a blast dodging the outstretched arms.

Deciding to at least try the dad thing (the photos having been enough to trigger a feeling of paternity in him) the blond approaches Harley, scooping the small boy up and holding him against his chest “are you making your dad do all the work for you?” he asked, humming in amusement as Gwil rolls his eyes dramatically, sighing as he wipes a hand over his brow.

Harley babbles something mostly incoherent, burying his face in Ben’s sweater and gripping onto his shoulders, the blond unable to help the smile that appears on his face. Moving to help pass some first day essentials to Gwil, Ben thinks that he could get used to this, could get used to being a part of a family.

They’re soon heading out the door, Harley clinging to Ben’s hand as they start towards the car, Frankie barking at them from inside the house, not happy after her morning of pats and praise is brought to an end. The blond’s attention is drawn away from the barking as he feels Harley let go, the small ginger racing towards the car, his backpack bouncing with each step, the bag half the size of him and tempting chuckles from both males as they walk after him.

Gwil looks to Ben, the blond meeting his eyes and wrapping an arm around his shoulders, pulling him close, pecking him on the cheek before sighing “you gonna be alright? I know how well you’ve grown into the position of ‘overprotective dad,’ and it’s sweet, but unfortunately I didn’t grab any tissues before we locked up,” Ben hums, bemused, melting against Gwil’s side as they approach the car, Harley eagerly pulling on the handle until the car unlocks.

Gwil slips around to the driver’s side, and Ben approaches where Harley is settling into the booster seat, the blond more than happy to help him with his seatbelt, the red-head wriggling excitedly and unable to contain his first day jitters. By the time Ben gets into his own seat, Gwil is hurrying him along, the taller male concerned about the time they’re taking ‘faffing about’ in the back. Resisting the urge to poke fun at his choice of words, Ben relaxes, tuning out to the sound of the music and Harley and Gwil singing along.

Dropping Harley off is an emotional affair, but not for Harley himself, no, Ben is barely quick enough to pop around the side of the car before he’s jumping out, demanding his dad’s hurry up. Ben nods to himself, the determination definitely comes from him.

They take a hot minute to find his classroom, and by the time that they do, Ben can tell Gwil is more upset that he lets on, and when Harley hugs them goodbye, the brunet grips him like a lifeline, pressing a kiss to his soft pale red hair as the young boy finally wiggles free. Ben rests a hand on Gwil’s shoulder comfortingly, hand softly squeezing in reassurance as he stands back up, wiping at his face a moment.

“What did you say to me earlier? He’s going to be alright? He’s a big boy?”

Gwil spares a chuckle bumping him with his elbow playfully “shut up, smartarse” before the two embrace, Ben gripping him firmly, hand rubbing up and down his back. Ben feels bad that he can’t relate more, feels bad that he’s more of a visitor than he is Harley’s dad, the idea makes his heart drop, and if anything’s going to make him cry, it’s going to be entertaining that thought any more.

Once they’re sure Harley won’t come running out after them, they turn to slowly make their way back to the car, Gwil’s hand slipping into Ben’s and making the blond’s heart do flips, the wedding band on Gwil’s finger cool against his skin. They’re almost at the car when Gwilym suddenly stops and turns, starting towards another car, Ben frowning but not stopping as he’s dragged along behind the taller male.

Eventually, he realises that Gwil’s spotted Rami and Joe, and all the guesses from earlier are confirmed, because there she is- the girl, standing at the back of the car, Joe double checking everything is in her bag and Rami speedily pulling her hair up into two ponytails’. Ben is astonished-he now realises she looks so much like Rami, the tanned skin, the dark hair, with a pair of long-lashed hazel eyes that scream ‘Joe.’

“Uncle Gwil, uncle Ben!” the girl exclaims, making a move to approach them when Rami’s free hand slips to rest on her shoulder, the slightly frazzled looking man begging her not to move as he fiddles with the final ponytail.

“Mazie! How you doing? Excited for the first day?” _Mazie_ Ben thinks, nodding to himself, it suits.

Joe huffs amusedly from next to the pair, shaking his head slightly as he zips up the bag “it’s all getting a bit old for her now, could hardly get her out of bed this morning” the red-head explained, closing the boot and moving around, pale green bag now slung over his shoulder.

“That’s because you and papa we’re watching a scary movie and kept screaming last night” she pointed out, and right on cue Joe started spluttering, Rami dropped a hairbrush, Gwil choked on his own spit, and Ben broke out into shocked giggles.

“Oh, were they now? On a school night?” Ben exclaimed, sighing dramatically and shaking his head, Mazie giggling in response to the exasperated look on his face. Meanwhile, all three other men are still trying to regather themselves, it’s probably the funniest thing Ben’s ever witnessed.

Coughing into his elbow, trying to remember how to breath, Gwil clears his throat, a slightly confronted look on his face, “alright, well you guys are probably running late by now, better not keep you held up, I’ll see you at pickup, have a fun day, Mazie!” Gwil concluded, scoring a high five from the grinning girl before pulling Ben away and back towards the car.

As they walk, Gwil sighs “I think all four of us are gonna have to invest in some thicker walls.”


	3. No Wrong, No Right

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> alone with dream daddy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> okay, here's another one, and i just realised Harley's name is Harley Lee-Jones, so sorry Harley for that one 😂 anyway, i hope yall enjoy, i made myself very frustrated writing Ben's morals in this, but it had to be done, sorry in advance. also i'm a bit addicted to writing about photo's idk why its really fun for some reason.

Ben could tell that Gwil wanted nothing more than to go back and retrieve his son, to bring him home and pretend he wasn't growing up quicker than he wanted, and Ben told himself he could relate to the feeling. When they got home, they were greeted almost instantly by Frankie, the dog yipping and weaving around them as if trying to find Harley.

"Mazie's growing up fast, year three already, bet they're proud, she's such a smartie, her and Harley get along great too..." Gwil started, slipping his coat off and crouching to catch a handful of collie, the pale dog sniffing and licking at him as he talks.

Ben nods, trying to figure out how to manoeuvre a subject he knows nothing about. The blond can feel a tangle of nerves form in his stomach at the idea of them being alone together, what would they do now? Obviously neither of them had work today (Ben guessed the whole actor thing hadn’t changed, given the few awards he’d seen scattered around the house, including a picture of the three of them at a red carpet). He wondered what he’d do, if Gwil decided their day would be better spent in their bedroom, doing things Ben could have only dreamed of in the real world. Would he resist? Would he dare deny something he'd thought so much about? Would he be able to resist? Even if every moral fibre in his body told him it wasn't a good idea, that this Gwil wasn't his Gwil and he had no right? The idea made his head hurt.

"It's strange, after all this time of either staying at home and taking care of Harley all day or working away on a set, to just be able to sit down and relax. I feel like I've been dreadful to you two, leaving you both on your own here for so long. I'm lucky they even let me have this day off to send my own son to school. Times like this, I really realise how lucky I was to marry you, to find you, to raise a son with you." Ben felt his eyes go wide a moment as Gwil straightened up and started towards him, eyes burning into his, the blond swallowed thickly, trying his best to hold the gaze as the brunet stops in front of him.

"Benjamin Lee-Jones, I appreciate and love you more than I ever thought possible," Ben is pretty sure his heart was all but a pile of shrapnel at the bottom of his ribcage by this point, and he could feel his whole-body fill with a fuzzy feeling as the brunet reaches out, softly slipping his hands into Bens. "I can tell he misses me, and I can tell you've missed me... we should take him and Frankie out this afternoon, go to the park or something. You on the other hand..." Gwil shuffled closer, body pressing Ben back against the island, shivers wracking his body. "I'm sure we could squeeze in some 'us' time before he have to play exhaustless dad's again..."

 _'Us time' fuck._ Here it was, his moment of moral realisation, does he, or doesn't he? The blond breaths in deeply, looking around, his hands finding their way to press against Gwil's lower torso. "Gwil, I-I need to go to the bathroom really quick... rain check?” Ben didn’t wait to hear Gwil’s response before he was hastily making his way up to their bedroom, heart hammering and skin feeling hot.

Bursting into the room, he shuts the door, clicking the lock, before rubbing his hands up over his face, he was really in it now. Whilst he knew there was a fat chance this wasn’t real, it wouldn’t feel right, because if something in the universe really fucked up (because at this point he’d seen way too many movies to not suspect some universe bullshittery) he might end up sleeping with someone else’s Gwil, and if this fixed itself, he didn’t wanna have to look at and speak to real world Gwil knowing he’d shagged him in some other reality. The blond shook his head, this thinking was gonna give him a headache.

Calming himself down, he let himself look around the room, eyes glancing over all the little bits and bobs of ‘Ben and Gwil’s married life,’ most interestingly, a photo album. Not able to help himself, Ben let his curiosity get the best of him, approaching the chest of drawers and grasping the album, taking a deep breath before flipping the book open.

On the first page, there was a photo of the proposal, likely taken by Rami, Joe or Allen, considering how Ben could see Lucy covering her mouth in shock in the corner of the frame. In the middle of the picture were the couple, Gwil on a knee and Ben with his hands laced together behind his head, mouth open in a thrilled smile, eyes stuck on the box containing a gorgeous silver band. Ben bit his lip, flipping the pages to see a few more photo’s, these containing Gwil slipping the ring on, and then the two joining in an embrace, arms wrapped around each other and lips joined in a passionate kiss. Ben felt a gnawing sensation of jealousy reform in his stomach, and whilst he knew it wasn’t fair to be annoyed with someone else’s happiness, he couldn’t help himself.

Moving further through the book, he came across photos of their wedding, it had been a huge affair, and Gwil looked so nice in his suit that Ben almost popped a stiffy just from looking at the photo. He felt a smile slip onto his face at the group photo’s, Lucy looking stunning in her dress, Joe looking teary but happy as he smiles into the camera, arm wrapped around Gwil and his hand subtly clutching Rami’s behind his back. Ben and his new husband were pressed completely against each other, and in one photo, Ben turned his head to press a kiss to the brunet’s cheek, the latter striking a surprised face at the kiss. Ben couldn’t bring himself to feel envious of these, rather they brought a light, floating feeling into his chest.

After that, there were the photos of baby Harley, the boy likely no older than a couple of hours or so, the two proud dads too caught up on the little bundle in front of them to take any notice of the camera. Behind them, Ben could see a whiteboard, and from what letters were shown, he’d take a wild stab that Gwil’s sister had been a big part of the whole thing. The next photo proved as much, the image showing the two men sitting either side of Gwilym’s very tired looking sister, her thumbs up and an exhausted smile on her face. She looked incredibly similar to Gwilym in some aspects, and Ben wasn’t at all surprised to find out she’d been the surrogate.

He kept skimming through the pages, taking in page after page of the two of them in various romantic settings, various achievements for Harley, and even a couple photos of Mazie and Harley playing at the park or messing around with Frankie. Ben also couldn’t help but blush and giggle when he saw photo’s that had to have definitely been taken by the gang- images such as; Ben mid fall, Frankie no more than a blur against his legs, her eyes wild and tongue out. A photo of Gwil asleep on a couch, Ben colouring in his stubble with permanent marker. Mazie covering Lucy’s head in hair-clips and Harley painting her nails will… oil pastels? Ben with his fists up jokingly at a very disinterested kangaroo. Gwil laying in the open mouth of a giant crocodile statue (this one spanned over a couple of images, the first with just him, and the second with a toddler Harley crying his eyes out because his dad’s in danger). Rami mid dance pose in his Freddie Mercury getup, Mazie copying him with a hilariously serious face (eyes drawn, brow furrowed, mouth pouted and everything). Joe holding Harley up, the little ginger ready to throw a punch at Cardy B’s face, Mazie’s leg stuck up like a karate kick, aimed directly for Cardy’s groin (Ben inwardly cringed at that one).

Ben was at the end of the album by this point, and he expected something sweet and sentimental to finish it off,  
but instead he was greeted by a picture of Gwil’s shocked face, eyes wide, mouth open, arm up to try and ward the camera holder off, but it did nothing to hide the equally stunned Ben underneath him, face contorted, likely about to say ‘fuck off!’ just as the photo was taken. Ben was just relieved they’d been under the covers.

The blond hums to himself, still a bit caught off guard by the last photo as he places the album down. He knows he has to go back out and face Gwil, but he still has no idea what he’s doing, how could you say no to a man like that? Also, there was still the matter of whether any of this was even real, so by using that logic, if he just so happened to sleep with the man of his dreams, it shouldn’t have any effect on anything. The blond groans, deciding just to go with his gut the next time Gwil comes onto him, because if he tried to think this through anymore, he might have a brain aneurysm, even after attacking the concept a few times, he was still no closer to having an answer.

Making his way back downstairs, he has to do a double take, because Gwil’s pressed right up against the wall, tapping at it with his knuckles every few seconds. The brunet looking up at the sound of Ben’s feet against the hardwood, looking guilty a moment “uh, I can explain, I was trying to figure out how thin the walls are…hate for Harley to…hear us.”

Ben struggles not to blush at the thought, having a brief flashback to the moment Mazie had rendered three grown men incapable of basic functions. The blond supressed a giggle, and was about to comment on the aforementioned incident, when Gwil spoke up again, straightening his back and moving closer to Ben, the dynamic changing almost instantly.

“But the good news is… he’s not here right now, so I suppose it doesn’t matter. Whaddya say, love? Use the break to our advantage?” The brunet suddenly seemed so incredibly tall now, Ben’s neck craning to look up at his ‘husband.’ He can feel a shiver run up his spine at the look in his eye, he’s looking at the blond like he’s a treat, and when a lovely, long-fingered hand lands on Ben’s hip, he almost jumps.

When they kiss, Ben almost dies and goes to heaven, he’d almost forgotten how easy it was to get lost against the feeling of Gwil’s lips, the feeling of his beard against his face, the eager press of his hips and lips and tongue. Ben allows himself to lose focus for a minute, only interested in the drag of his mouth and how Gwil’s hair felt under his fingers.

They part for air and like a slap in the face, Ben’s moral’s kick in, and he’s staring Gwil in the face with neither a yes or a no to defend himself.

_What the fuck do I do?_


	4. One Real Decision

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben's morals get into a quarrel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> okay, so this is kind of a filler kinda not? idk, i guess im just a bit stuck on which direction to go- because whilst i love hardcore smut as much as the next guy, i also like some semblance of a narrative and to have characters with semi-consistent morals. so im a little torn, in other words

Ben told himself he’d let his gut decide whether to go any further, but now, caught between Gwilym and a wall, his hands so gentle against his hips, breath hot and hesitant against his face. There’s a catch in Ben’s throat, and he can’t say anything, he slides his hands down the brunet’s shoulders, fingers coming to softly grip his elbows, he can’t bring himself to look at Gwil, because if he does he has no clue what might happen.

Gwil sighs then, and slips his hands up Ben’s back to clutch his shoulder blades, pulling the blond against his chest “we don’t have to… I just thought you’d want a redo after last night…I wasn’t really on my A-game, could hardly keep my eyes open, this filming is crazy. We should be done soon though, then I can become a real dad and husband again” Ben had roughly no idea as to what Gwil was talking about, but even so, he knew Gwil could never disappoint him, could never leave him wanting more, he was perfect.

“You’re already a real dad…and a real husband. Harley adores you, and I…” Ben trails off, weary of his next words, the blond inhaling slowly, running his tongue over his front teeth, steeling himself. When he meets Gwil’s gaze, he feels a weird mix of intimidated and so incredibly turned on, and his voices wavers a moment as he continues “-I couldn’t imagine a life without you in it.”

Except he could, and he had, he’d experienced a life of staring from afar, a life of trying to remember how to breath after every smile, every second of eye contact, every laugh. He’s also experienced the painful stab every time they’re separated, every time he turns to look at him to find Gwil isn’t looking back, every time he’s talking with someone else and smiling like all of his problems have just been lifted and Ben feels like he’s just been shot.  

Ben can feel a sting against the backs of his eyes, and for a moment he’s worried he might start crying in front of Gwil, crying about what was right in front of him that he couldn’t have. The blond swallows the lump in his throat, looking away from the brunet a moment to recover himself, and it’s this twist of pain and dissatisfaction with real life that finally makes the choice for him. Putting on his best smile, the blond looks up at Gwilym again, flashing him a grin and hoping his voice doesn’t betray him “and if you can put that ‘exhaustless’ shtick on, I think I can help you find your A-game.”

Ben’s not entirely sure how long his courage is going to last, or whether or not his moral’s will return to ruin everything, but for now he pushed the thought aside to instead focus on not tripping and falling on his arse as Gwil spins them and starts for their room. Mouth’s eager and insistent, Ben clings to Gwilym as they stumble up the stairs, the two desperate not to part, even if it made the whole journey six times longer and ten times more difficult. Ben feels his skin zing electrically when all of a sudden there’s hands against his arse. He’d had his butt grabbed before, but now, with the brunet’s lovely long fingers squeezing and caressing, it’s like a whole new experience, and he finds himself moaning like an easy slag into Gwil’s mouth.

Finally tackling the stairs, their pace speeds back up, Ben’s hands slipping from Gwil’s biceps to his own belt, fumbling blindly at the buckle a moment, before sliding it out in one fluid motion and dropping it to the ground. He’s likely never been this goddamn hard before, and within seconds he’s palming himself through his pants, thrusting against his own hand as Gwil surprises him with a sharp squeeze. The two gasping out as they hit the door to the bedroom, the pair hesitating a moment to just rub up against each other, Ben’s hand moving from his desperate cock to slip around and sneak under the waistband of Gwil’s jeans, grabbing the flesh of the brunet’s butt through his underwear, the feeling sending the taller male thrusting against Ben, their bodies crashing together.

They almost fall arse over tip when Gwil finally manages to open the door, Ben quick to rip his sweater off once he’s sure he won’t fall over. As soon as the sweater hits the ground, Gwil is sliding his hands up over the taut muscle, hands grazing Ben’s nipples and making the shorter male go weak in the knees. A sensation that only gets worse once Gwil starts pressing kiss after kiss down his sternum, beard rubbing at his skin and teeth nipping at the sensitive flesh, Ben can’t bring himself to think anything other than ‘fuck’ ‘Gwil’ or ‘yes.’

Soon the blond’s wiggling out of his pants, kicking them off and sending them halfway across the room, Gwil straightening his back and pressing a kiss to Ben’s bitten lips, their mouths moving together a moment before the brunet pulls away, casting his eyes downwards. Ben watches his tongue swipe over his bottom lip at the sight of the outline of Ben’s cock, and the blond almost passes out at the look on Gwil’s face.

They kiss again, and this time, Ben’s knee’s buckle, the culprit being a curious, wandering hand closing over the outline of his knob. The only reason the shorter male hadn’t fallen on his face being Gwil’s free arm holding him up. Ben wraps his arms around Gwil’s neck, desperately bucking his hips against the hand, his lips brushing the soft skin of the other male’s neck, his breathy moans disturbing the short strands of dark hair on the side of Gwil’s head.

Needily grinding up and against the taller male’s hand, hips and whatever else he can get to, Ben hooks a leg around one of the brunet’s, wanting more- requiring more. “We’d be lucky if a certain somebody never hears us, you’re such a screamer sometimes, love” Gwil groans, breath hot against the blond’s neck, goose-bumps quick to pop up along the flesh. Ben simply mewling out in response, the sound trailing off with a squeak as he feels the sharp graze of teeth along his shoulder. He’s about to try and tug them down onto the bed, but then Gwil beats him, and after untangling them as much as possible, the taller male sends the blond toppling down onto the mattress.

Ben flops back against the bed, tucking an arm behind his head and watching as Gwil saunters towards him, pulling his shirt up and over his head and Ben swears he’s practically drooling as he watches the lean muscles of his arms and shoulders ripple and pull taut at the motion. Though it’s as he watches the shirt get tossed that his eyes catch on a photo frame, a selfie with Ben and Gwil, smiling brightly at him from the other side of the room. The blond hesitantly looks away, focusing instead on his own private strip show, Gwil now moving onto his jeans, and Ben nearly choked on his own air at the thick outline through the denim, a cock the blond had only dreamed of.

Though his eyes again flickered to the photo, and even after he looked away he could feel it… staring, watching him. The real Ben watching imposter Ben about to get fucked into the mattress.

By this point, the jeans have joined Gwil’s shirt, and the brunet is slipping his thumbs under the waistband, and Ben is sitting himself up, heart hammering and every fibre of his being itching to see what lies beneath the thin material. To get a good look at the long, thick length straining against its confines. He’s trying so hard to ignore the burn of the pictures gaze against his cheek, and for a moment, his eyes snap from one extremity to the next, the world in slow motion. He looks from straining cock to smiling couple back to straining cock and now his heads spinning but he so close to see Gwil’s knob and he’s so eager, then he can’t shake the feeling of being watched and all of a sudden, he’s screaming.

Not really, but he does say ‘stop, put your cock away’ rather forcefully.

He’s not sure what he’s going to do, but one thing is for sure, they’re probably not going to do it in here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes, i just did that, sorry.


	5. Visions Of One Sweet Union

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> y'all thought

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> i dedicate this 2k of smut to joseph francis mazzello the |||, nobody puts gwilym/harlee in a corner on my watch

 “What?” Gwil had frozen on the spot, hand’s unmoving against his hips, brows furrowed and eyes desperate, like he would explode if he didn’t get off soon. Ben felt guilty, but he couldn’t bring himself to follow through with that damn photo staring him down. The blond spared a glance at the frame before standing up, approaching Gwil and joining their lips in a soft kiss.

“Let’s do it somewhere else, let’s get creative” Ben knew he couldn’t back out now, and if he were honest, he didn’t want to either, but lord forgive he stayed here and tried to shag Gwil with a photo staring at him.

Sliding a hand down Gwil’s stomach, his fingers eventually came to clutch his cock, revelling in the noise of rapture that slips from his lips. The brunet hums in agreement, and then they’re shuffling back out of the room, hands reaching, hips grinding and mouth’s hungry. They nearly forget to grab the condom and lube on the way out, much too caught up in each other.

The second they’re out the door, Ben leaps at Gwil, arms wrapping around his shoulders and then they’re falling, collapsing onto the carpet, Gwil winces, but the sound is silenced against Ben’s lips, the blond moving to straddle his hips, rolling them in long, languid strokes, finger’s digging into the firm skin of the taller males torso as he feels his length drag up over the hard line of Gwil’s, both males eyes sliding closed, heads tilting back in almost perfect synch. Ben shakily moving to place the other’s hands on his hips.

“Your knees are gonna hurt like a bitch after this,” Gwil groans, grinding up against him, cheeks tinted pink.

“Great, might even out how much my arse is gonna ache after I ride you into the carpet” Ben growls, slipping one of his hands up to rest against Gwil’s sternum, nail’s grazing over the sparse dark hair marring the smooth skin of his chest. He let’s his eyes slide back shut again, rutting against the tent in the brunet’s underwear.

He soon grows restless, his boxer briefs stained where his needy cock is leaking through the fabric, it’s a bit of a struggle wiggling out of them, but once he’s free the relief is short lived. Gwil is still frustratingly clothed, and Ben takes the opportunity to rid him too of his underwear whilst the brunet stares dreamily at the shorter male’s cock.

Gwil is… _wow_.

That’s all Ben can bring himself to think at finally seeing Gwil’s cock, bared and right there in front of him. Ben for a moment forgets what he’s doing, eyes stuck on the thick, stiff length in his hand, and he’s only broken out of his trance by Gwil suddenly speaking up, the brunet chuckling hesitantly a moment, before sitting himself up, hand coming to press against Ben’s cheek. “Stop looking at me like that.”

“Stop looking at you like what?” Ben furrows his brow, leaning in a moment to press a long, heated kiss to the other’s mouth, the latter humming a moment, sighing once they finally pull away.

“Like you’ve never seen my cock before.”

 _If only you knew_ , Ben thought to himself, sparing a chuckle at the thought, before flashing Gwil a cheeky smile, punctuating the look with a slowly roll of his hips, the blond sighing at the drag and falling against the taller male’s chest, breath hot against Gwilym’s skin. He continues thrusting their hips together, his hands gripping the other's shoulders firmly, fingers clenching with every snap of his pelvis.

He starts with a squeak, suddenly feeling a cold, slick finger pressing at his entrance, and he almost comes on the spot. It feels like at any moment Gwil could disappear, like Ben could just wake up at any moment, alone in his bed, stiff as a board and cripplingly isolated. The thought works to only make Ben ever more impatient, the shorter male making a needy noise and pushing back against the finger, Gwil quickly buried to the knuckle and ripping a thankful gasp from the male on his lap.

From that point onwards, Gwil takes no mercy, curling and flexing and twisting his finger into the blond, Ben quivering and jerking his hips erratically, a hand slipping to curl around Gwil’s bicep, an arm wrapping around the latter's neck, the hand coming up to slide up the back of the brunet’s head. Ben groans, his skin ridging with goose bumps as the bristly hair’s scratch at the soft, sensitive skin of his neck.

“You’re gonna set the dog off if you keep howling like that, love” Gwil chuckles, punctuating himself with sliding a second finger into the blond in one go, Ben proving his ‘husbands’ point by moaning out in reaction, a shockwave running up through his spine at the long, firm drag against his prostate.

“God, you’re a bastard” he chuckles, thought the sound is mostly air as yet another well aimed push renders him speechless. He presses his cheek against the side of the other’s head, dramatically moaning into Gwil’s ear and letting out a long, raspy laugh as the brunet flinches away.

Though he’s not laughing for long, because Gwil takes his revenge in the form of sliding in his third finger, pushing all the way in before pausing, leaving Ben whining, his hips desperately gyrating, voice already half-ruined as he begs the brunet for more. Though Gwil still waits up until Ben breaths a squeaky “I’m sorry, fuck, I’m sorry.”

Taking a frustratingly long time to decide whether the apology was genuine enough, Ben’s about ready to smack him over the head before his hand starts moving again, slightly catching Ben off guard and leaving him mewling out in surprise, arm around Gwil’s neck tightening as he arches his back forwards, their chest’s touching and cocks brushing together between their stomachs. Both shuddering at the brief and almost painfully pleasureful collision of skin.

By the time Gwilym finally decides he’s teased and stretched Ben enough, the blond is a shaking, whining mess on his lap, their stomachs well and truly coated in pre-cum, and once he removes his fingers, Ben let’s out the loudest groan of annoyance he’s likely ever made. Gwil, the sadist, has the audacity to giggle at his partner’s frustration, pressing a brief kiss to his shoulder as he rolls the rubber on, groaning at the soft touch at his destitute cock.

It feels like forever and a day before Ben finally feels the tentative push of the tip of Gwil’s cock against his loosened rim, and then he’s sliding in, and by the time he’s bottomed out, Ben swears everything in his universe has aligned. This is the peak moment, and he’s ready to ascend to heaven at this point. Every dream, every masturbation thought, every passing questionable notion, lead up to this point, and Ben can safely say that this, this feeling of being fuller than he’s ever been, has, easily exceeded all previous expectations.

He squares his knees, shuffling them out a bit to try and better fit the satisfyingly sizeable length inside him, the blond wincing as it just manages to brush the right spot. He swallows the moan in his throat, trying to focus on relaxing around the _very_ welcomed intrusion. It takes a moment, but eventually he’s able to nod, managing a whimper that kind of sounds like the word ‘yes.’

Then they start moving against each other, and Ben thanks every god, lord, and prophet for letting him have this moment, this moment of pure bliss and unadulterated fulfilment. He scratches three long scores down Gwil’s back, and the brunet manages a groan, before taking hold of both sides of his hips, the pair rolling with barely a push from Gwil. Ben making a noise of surprise, but much too blissed out to even think of complaining.

Gwil settles between Ben’s legs, his hands scrambling to wrap the limbs around his hips as he blankets the smaller male’s body. The blond sighing as his partner takes full advantage of the new position, his hips thrusting hard and fast into his lustful husband, Ben squirming and moaning underneath him, using his calves as leverage to yank the taller male into him upon each flex, that godly damned cock hitting the right spot each bloody time, sprinkling Ben’s vision with little black dots.

Then he feels one hand being pried from where it’s scratching angry red lines into his back, Gwil's shaky hand lacing their fingers together, before pinning it above their heads, Ben arching up against him, hand squeezing the other male’s harshly with each piston of his hips. Ben can’t stop all the noises tumbling from his mouth at this point, all the winces, all the breathy curses, all the growls of Gwil’s name that come off as weak rasps because by this point, his voice is all but in tatters.

 “That’s it, love, take my cock, you’re always so fucking good at it… you’re so tight still, almost like I didn’t fuck you last night… who- fuck- who cares… my magical little cock slut… ah, Ben, you drive me crazy sometimes” the blond, for the second time today, thinks _if only you knew_ a smirk managing to find its way onto his face a moment, before he catches the rest of the sentence, and almost come’s right then and there. Only holding back because like hell he wanted to ruin this by coming too early.

Peeling himself half away from Ben, Gwil braces himself on his knees, one hand still laced with Ben’s, but the other at the base of his neck, thumb grazing the sharp line of his collarbone. Ben splutters a moment at the hold, but quickly get’s over it, instead caught up on the harsh pounding against his prostate, the blond crying out in elation, back arching up and down violently a moment as he feels his climax start to build delectably quickly inside his pelvis.

He holds back still, squeezing his eyes shut, lip between his teeth, body shaking, his cock aching like all hell against his stomach. He feels the hand on his chest slip a bit and manages to growl through gritted teeth to not touch him. The demand is met with no resistance, and the brunet keeps up his breakneck pace into the smaller male. Then, between all his jumbled thoughts and internal begs to come, he remembers the one thing he’d always thought of doing, one of the main reason’s he’d ever get married.

Slipping his eyes open, the blond reached his free hand to grip the one against his sternum, pulling it up towards his face, then, holding teary eye contact with a red-faced, confused looking Gwil, he slipped the ring finger into his mouth, tongue slowly sliding up the digit, before he hooked his teeth behind the band, and slowly slid it off, tongue laving up over the underside as he went.

As soon as he popped off the finger, Gwil’s wedding ring still caught between his teeth (though he quickly slipped it onto the tip of his tongue because he didn’t really want to end up at the hospital with a wedding ring in his stomach), the brunet came, his hips going from well measured and precise, to erratic and all over the place in seconds, and it was this shaky, harsh thrusting, that finally brought Ben to his end, the blond quickly dropping the ring onto the floor beside him just milliseconds before his climax hit him like a train.

He clenched down around the now sensitive Gwil, and the brunet almost collapsed on top of him. Ben felt the corners of his mouth curl as he cried out, his untouched cock coating his stomach, and for a moment he can’t see anything past the haze that has blanketed his vision, the blond, breathing in lungful’s of air as he comes down. With shaky arms, he pushes Gwil off of him, the older male landing next to him with a wheeze and a thump.

Exhausted and incredibly sated, neither move for a few long moments, Ben’s arms full of lead jelly, and his brain trying to piece itself back together, still not entirely sure what to make of whatever the hell just happened. Then, when Gwil finally finds his voice, it takes him a moment to translate the words.

“You- you’ve never… fucking hell you were… I can’t even- fuck Ben, you really blow me away sometimes.”

Still a little dazed and confused, the blond furrows his brow, before groaning “seriously? I’m sorry but you’re gon’ have to give me a few minutes before I can even think of blowing you.”

“…What?”

“What?”


	6. And In My Heart It Shows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a filler because im a lazy bitch lmao

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> okay, here's a quick filler, because joe and ben did the video yesterday and i haven't gotten over my own salt levels

Ben had thought he’d feel gross afterwards, like he’d just committed a cardinal sin, like Satan was going to rise up out of the ground and pull him under into the pits of hell.

But the blond feels none of these things, just an unbelievable floating feeling, like nothing could dampen his mood, and when he turns his head to look at the tired, smiling brunet beside him, the feeling only increases. He feels drained, but so damn lucky.

At some point, Gwil regains use of his limbs, and sits himself up, sighing satisfactorily, hands rubbing up over his face, before he pulls the rubber off. “My knees are killing me, you’re lucky you’re worth it, love” he groans, rolling his shoulders, and Ben can’t help but flash him a winning grin.

The grin turns into a smirk, the blond humming, intrigued “what was that you said earlier… ‘ _Your knees are gonna hurt like a bitch after this_ ’ funny how that works” he points out, grimacing at the mess all over his stomach, and almost crying out as he shuffles into a sitting position “Jesus, what’d you do? Split me in half? Fuck sake” he growls, stumbling to his feet, teeth gritted, body aching, _too old for this_ he thought with a pained chuckle.

“Love, help me up, c’mon” Gwil groaned, reaching around beside him a moment to retrieve his lost ring, before taking the hand Ben had offered.

The blond spared a glance at the carpet, breathing through his teeth, pulling his underwear on as he shares a look with Gwil “d’you reckon we messed up the carpet?”

“If we did, you’re the one that’s gonna clean it up, mr ‘I couldn’t wait five seconds to fuck my husband’” Ben glares at the brunet, and the latter can’t help but giggle at the look on his face, Gwilym pressing a kiss to his cheek, before starting back towards the bedroom, the blond taking a nice long look at the other males arse until it disappears into the room.

He comes back a few moments later, fully clothed, with tissues in hand, Ben taking them thankfully and mopping up the mess on his lower torso. “You can’t blame me, have you seen yourself?” honestly, if Gwil understood Ben’s predicament, other than being very confused and very freaked out, he would understand.

“Wow, what a charmer,” the brunet chuckles, and Ben shrugs, an easy smile on his face. It may be horribly cringy and sappy, but he’s pretty sure he hasn’t been this content in a long time, and for a moment he’s worried he might disappear, might snap out of whatever’s happening to him. Who knows, maybe he’s dead, and this is just a hallucination to make him feel complete, a way to ease him into whatever comes after death.

 _Wow, that sure went dark,_ Ben thought, blinking his eyes madly a few times, trying to shake off the thought before he got lost in a rabbit hole. Even after achieving one of his life goals- sleep with Gwilym Lee- he was still full of so many questions.

He was roused from his thoughts by the taller male’s voice “hmm, I dunno about you, but I think I’m gonna go for a shower… feel free to join me, of course” and then just like that, Ben was going to achieve his goal again.

* * *

 

“D’you reckon he’s doing alright?” the question came as a surprise, and despite Ben’s voice being soft, and hardly intelligible over the noise coming from the tv, Gwil could understand just fine, because he’d been thinking the exact same thing.

After ‘conserving water’ the two had decided to enjoy some quiet time in the final hours before picking Harley up, so, they’d decided to throw on a movie (which just so happened to be Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron- one of Harley’s favourite movies) and relax, cuddled up against each other, Frankie watching them from the end of the couch.

“He should be fine, and I’m sure Rami or Joe said something to Mazie before school, y’know, to keep an eye on him at lunch- and he’s so bloody smart, bet he’s already top of the class” Ben can’t help but grin at Gwil’s words, because holy hell, he was adorable. “I can’t wait to see him again, god I dunno how I’ve survived being away from him while filming so much, I know that you said I am a real dad and all that, but I don’t really feel it, and he’s growing up so damn fast and I-“

Gwil’s cut off by Ben’s lips, the blond cupping his face and silencing all self-doubt that had been on the tip of the other’s tongue. “You are…the realest, and I won’t hesitate to… smother you in hugs until you believe it” he breathed between kisses, only relenting once he felt Gwil chuckle against his lips, taking back all his former self-criticisms, but pulling Ben against his chest anyway a couple seconds later, the two collapsing onto their sides, rolling around and giggling like a pair of school girls.

At seeing the drama unfolding, Frankie stands up, whining at the pair, before launching herself at them, and Ben assumes all is well until he hears the growling, and the blond peels himself away from the brunet, Frankie establishing herself on Gwil’s lap. Staring Ben down, the collie doesn’t stop growling, tail wavering cautiously, and Ben knows that she knows something is up.

“Frankie, what are you doing? Off me, don’t growl at your dad like that!’ Gwil scolds, pointing at the floor until she backs down and obeys. Ben’s heart beating a little quicker than before, even after the blond dog is gone.

“I suppose I should be feeling jealous of the dog, then” Ben chuckled and plastered on a fake smile, but in reality, he was shaken to his core. Frankie had finally figured it out, and a part of him took that as a sign that his time was running out.

* * *

 

It was still half an hour until school ended when Gwil shot up off the couch and started getting ready to pick Harley up, his voice raising in pitch with his excitement as he went to hunt down his coat (though that turned into him switching shirts three times and nearly falling down the stairs twice. Ben had to practically tackle him to stop him from accidentally hurting himself.

Ben manages to somehow convince Gwil to wait another ten minutes before dragging him to the car, the brunet bursting at the seams as he tears out of the driveway, the blond clutching the handle above the car door like a lifeline. He’s never been more scared of Gwil in his entire life, and the maniacal smile on the other’s face certainly doesn’t help.

By nothing short of a miracle, they survive the drive to Harley’s school, and then, after nearly dying in a car crash THREE TIMES IN FIVE MINUTES, Gwil decides it’s a remarkable idea to sprint to Harley’s classroom.

This is a grownass man, that misses his son so much, he’s using his sore knees (sore from _fucking his husband through the floor, that is)_ to run through the school.

Ben decides just to walk, like a normal human being.


	7. A Glimpse Of Hope And Unity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mazlek and Harlee chill at the park

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> i tried to add more rami, i hope this does the trick

Upon reaching Harley’s classroom, Ben found Gwil leaning on the doorframe, trying to peer in and catch a glimpse of his little ginger, Ben couldn’t help but giggle at the looks of a few parents faces, like they could recognize the pair and couldn’t really believe they were here. The blond walked up behind Gwil, tapping him on the shoulder and trying to move him away from the door, because surely there was a couple very off-put kids looking at the strange man staring at them.

“I can see him, he’s in one piece, thank the bloody lord” Gwil sighed, pulling back from the door and turning to face Ben, a goofy grin on his face, his fingers thrumming against his thighs, “I text Rami while I was waiting for you, they’re gonna meet us at the park after school.”

Ben nodded, a coil of excitement forming in his stomach- he still found it so bloody intriguing that the two were together in this weird fantasy, hallucination possible death vision, and he was even more surprised that they had a fucking kid! That was so bloody wild, and better still, Mazie seemed really cool (and funny as all hell, even if she didn’t know what she was on about).

Sparing a glance around them, Ben bit his lip “I think some of these people recognise us, they’re staring” he whispered, the hand that had found its way to Gwil’s wrist tightening, he could feel an edge of anxiety tugging at him, but if he was honest, he wasn’t anxious for himself, he was anxious for Harley. For what parents might get their kids to do once they find out who the little ginger’s parents are. Ben knows it’s probably a ridiculous thought, but it doesn’t stop him from worrying a little while longer.

“They’re probably just shocked to see two men together… or they could be checking you out, gorgeous. I know I would be” Ben can’t help but gape disbelievingly at the other’s words, his free hand coming up to lay a light smack to the brunet’s chest, Gwil chuckling, before freeing his held wrist and wrapping the arm around Ben’s shoulders.

They wait there for at least ten minutes before the bell finally rings and a steady stream of small children come tear arsing out of the classroom, squealing with joy at finally seeing their parents after a long day of separation and exploration. Ben could see Gwil got a little flustered with the amount of very short people scrambling around him, like a minefield of tripping hazards, and the blond tried his best not to giggle at the worried look on his face.

Harley was one of the last out, and the second he came into view, Ben could feel Gwil relax against him, the arm around Ben slipping free as he kneels down, arm’s drifting open as their son’s eyes finally find them, a huge smile splitting his face as he starts running to them, falling easily into Gwil’s arms. Ben watches Gwil talk to Harley, his face covered in a look of pure relief, and the blond can feel his insides turn all fuzzy, the feeling only doubling as they all start towards the car park, Harley grabbing one hand from each dad and starting on about his day.

“My teacher didn’t stop asking about you and dad, she said she saw you in the singing movie” Harley explained, leaping through a hopscotch course chalked into the pavement, Ben and Gwil lifting him on each jump, the ginger giggling.

Ben shared a look with Gwil, the brunet furrowing his brow before looking down at the little boy “did she now? Did you end up getting any work done?” he asked, voice soft but slightly concerned, and Ben couldn’t blame him, though it had been inevitable, he’d just kinda hoped it wouldn’t have come this soon.

Harley nodded, jumping and giggling as he was lifted by his dads “no papa, it’s the first day, no work first day” he explained, sounding hilariously exasperated.

Ben couldn’t help but chuckle, before sighing “yeah papa, no work on the first day, obviously.”

Throwing up his free hand in surrender, Gwil groaned “alright, alright, I’m sorry, my mistake you two, how dare I assume school is for education” Ben looked down and met Harley’s gaze, before they both started booing Gwil in perfect unison. Gwil tried to look unamused, but the fact that he couldn’t quite hold in his chuckles betrayed his façade.

“So, what did you do at lunch, Harley?” Ben asked, hoping for the life of him that the little boy had managed to make friends, even if he’d just ended up seeking out solace in Mazie.

“Playground tiggy with my table group. I’m in green group, we’re the best group” he explained, wiggling his shoulders briefly to stop his bag (which was still ridiculously too big for him) from slipping off. The little green-eyed boys words were like a kick to the gut of nostalgia, and he finds himself nodding, so incredibly happy that Harley had a good first day.

“Alright, so Harley, we’re going to meet uncle Rami, uncle Joe and Mazie at the park, that sound alright?” Gwil explained, his voice hesitantly firm, like he was trying to be assertive, but if Harley said he was too tired, he wouldn’t flinch before cancelling plans.

“Is Frankie coming?”

Gwil struggled to find the words a moment, his eyes turning a bit shocked, and Ben knew it was because he must still be weary of the incident earlier with the dog. “Uhm, no, I think we should leave her be, she’s a bit-tired buddy” Gwil explained, coming to a stop as they reach the car and fishing into his pockets to retrieve the keys.

Ben helps Harley into his seat, the ginger giving a yawn as soon as he settles in his seat, rubbing at his eyes with his little fists, and Ben has to admire his determination, still wanting to go play at the park with his friend despite tiredness pulling at his little bones. The blond smiles, slipping out and softly shutting the door, moving around to get into his own seat.

The trip isn’t too long, but its long enough for Harley to grab a quick nap (in which Ben feels like a villain after having to wake him) and even though he’s still a bit drowsy, almost the second he sees Mazie through the window, he’s back to his usual lively self. Ben barely able to unbuckle all the belts through his excited wiggling.

Once he’s free, Harley bolts towards Mazie, the older girl spotting him almost instantly (probably no thanks to the ginger hair that’s practically blinding in the afternoon sun) and the two quick to charge towards the playground together, both yelling and squealing about which game to play first. Ben catches a wave from Joe, flicking his hand back in response and nodding towards a free bench near the playground (because he knows Gwil would want to be as close as possible to protect the children from anything and everything).

The four dad’s all settle down, Ben unable to keep his eyes off of Joe and Rami, because it wasn’t every day you got to see shit like this, and he’d likely not get over it. It's then that Joe gets the chat off to an... Interesting start “okay, Ben, from one bottom to another”

“Hold on a second, what? I’m not- what are you?”

Everyone at the table looked confused at Ben’s words, like it was really that hard to believe he might not be a bottom, and the blond frowned, glaring at each of them, including Gwil, because the other looked way too amused. Ben bites his lip, giving his dignity a proper goodbye, before speaking up “Yeah, alright, what were you gonna say… from one bottom to another?” Ben asks, the last part coming out through gritted teeth, quickly regretting even getting out of the car.

“Okay, so you two already know that Mazie heard us, right? Well, Rami doesn’t think we need thicker walls, he just thinks I should ‘be quieter’ which is bullshit, right? If Gwil is plowing you re-”

Ben feels his insides drop and he nearly launches himself across the table, madly hissing at Joe to shut up, thankfully, Rami is there, and is quick to clap a hand over the red-heads mouth before it can get any worse. Joe complaining at his partner, the sounds muffled but no doubt way too much for little children to overhear. “Joe, think your words through carefully” Rami sighed, looking to Joe and holding his gaze until the silenced male finally sighs, nodding.

“What I was trying to say before my ru-” it only takes an exasperated look from Rami before Joe is reconsidering his words “my amazing, gorgeous, intelligent husband, cut me off, is that it’s hard to stay quiet, right Ben? Like, they don’t get it, their… _y’knows_ , are just too good at their job, how is that our fault? So, this is why we need to just get our walls insulated more or something” it was almost disturbing how serious Joe sounded, and Ben could feel his whole face turn hot and red.

“He has a point, I suppose, but you could always just…” Ben trailed off, insinuating biting down onto his fist, and Joe rolled his eyes, groaning and dramatically getting to his feet.

“I can’t bear to be around such Neanderthal’s- not you Rami, you’re a level above the rest of us and I love you, you’re perfect! I’m gonna go push Harley on the swing and be an amazing uncle” Joe declared, pressing a kiss to Rami’s cheek before starting towards the playground.

“Please don’t discuss this with the children!” Gwil calls after him, the red-head throwing his index and middle finger up over his shoulder, the brunet sighing at the gesture, shaking his head slightly. “No offense, Rami, but… how do you…”

“Deal with that?” the tanned male finishes, Gwil nodding, and Rami’s face was taken over by a sheepish smile, shrugging his shoulders slowly, face turning a pretty shade of pink “I dunno, we balance each other out I guess” he supplied, biting down on his lip, watching the red-head tuck Harley into the kids swing, Mazie swinging off his other arm, Joe’s hands well and truly full, but giving it 110%.

Gwil chuckles from beside Ben, the blond confused a moment before the tall male explains himself “we get it, Rami, you’ve been in love since high school and you cant remember a day that went by without you thinking of him,” Ben thought the comment had been kind of rough, up until Rami himself started laughing, throwing his hands up in mock surrender.

“Okay, okay, you got me, fair play Mr. Lee-Jones” Rami chuckled, running a hand up through his hair, turning to watch Joe simultaneously push Harley on the swing, and have a stick fight with Mazie. When he turns back around, he’s wearing a devious smirk, his eyes falling on Ben and the blond feeling a feather of worry form in the pit of his stomach. “So, has the perfect Gwilym Lee been able to at all cope without something to hover over all day?”

Ben felt very confused, he had no idea what this dynamic was, and now all eyes were on him, the blond struggling to find his voice under the weight of both their gazes, and he started shaking his head in a bunch of random directions, hands coming up in a sort of shrug, “Ye-uhm, arhm, n-yea-no? I don’t know, he’s been fine?”

Rami rolled his eyes, “Sweet Ben, you’re loyal to a fault,” the blond could only smile, hoping it was a compliment. A few quiet seconds pass, before Rami smacks the table and speaks up, voice very amused. “Okay, I have to tell somebody, okay so the other morning, I’m trying to catch up on sleep- Mazie’s been up so much with nightmares after Joe let her watch Prisoner of Azkaban last week and of course I’m the one to comfort her all night. Anyway, I’m trying to sleep, and then Joe’s like, all over me, and he’s somehow _in the mood_ at five in the morning, and I’m _so tired_ and I end up having to lock him in the walk-in closet because he’s trying to get into my pants so badly. Then I forget he’s in there, and leave him in there, for like, three hours? I only realise he’s missing because when I’m getting Mazie ready for her swimming lessons, he isn’t pretending to do indecent things with those little floaty stick toys!”

Gwil and Ben share an incredulous look, before casting their eyes back to Rami, whose sat on the edge of his seat awaiting a response. Its Gwil who finally speaks up “I can’t say he didn’t deserve it, wow Rami, remind me never to try and get into your pants ever again,” he sounds serious at the start, but by the end, he and Rami are giggling at each other, and Ben is wondering whether this whole thing is actually a crazy drug trip.

An hour or so passes, and eventually Harley comes wandering over to them, wiping at his eyes and yawning, tugging at Ben’s hand with a grumpy look on his face, “Daddy, I wanna go home!” The little ginger demands, clambering up onto the seat and then into Ben’s lap, the blond wrapping his arms around the tired little boy, reassuring Harley that they’ll go home shortly.

Sticking to his promise, it’s not a few moments later that Joe comes jogging over, Mazie on his back and the exhausted dad panting his lungs out, “alright, princess Mazie, Creselda has to go back to his stable now, off you get” he begs, kneeling until the girl drops off his back. “Alright, I need a Panadol, a mid strength beer, and some Rami time” he groans, dropping onto the bench, grimacing as he tries to catch his breath.

Saying goodbye before Joe can resume the wall discussion, the two families part ways, Harley tired, Gwil amused and thoroughly happy with the evening, and Ben more confused than he’s ever been in his whole life.


	8. It's a Celebration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> harley is tired and ben is concerned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> ohohoho whats gonna happen whats gonna happen?! not too long till yall find out now, hope yall enjoy!!

The rest of the evening was quiet, with Harley going straight to his room, Ben coming up a few moments later the find the young boy crashed on his bed, shoes still on and bag discarded in the middle of the room. Ben couldn’t help the smile on his face, quietly approaching the sleeping ginger, before running a hand up over the side of his face, cheeks soft under his fingertips, tucking a few bright strands behind his ears, the blond felt a twang in his chest, this wasn’t his kid, he was merely an imposter, a stand-in parent. Ben took a deep breath in, tucking his hands into his pockets as he quietly snuck back out of the room, a sad smile curling his lips and a bittersweet ache in his heart.

“Is he out for the count?” Gwil asked, turning around from where he’d been doing something on his laptop, Ben nodding, taking a seat beside him, running a hand up over his face.

“Yeah, probably will be the rest of the afternoon, until dinner, at least.”

“Understandable, he had a big day. God I wish he’d stop growing sometimes, he’s barely a preppie yet and I already feel like he’s about to move out, I’d hate to think how Rami and Joe feel” Gwil sighs, closing the lid to the laptop, hand finding one of Ben’s atop the table, their fingers gently lacing together, the touch sending a floating feeling around Ben’s body. He could relate to the fear, except it came from a different place, he wasn’t scared of Harley growing up, he was scared of blinking and finding himself back in his normal, lonely life, no Harley, no Gwil, just a painful attraction to someone who’d never see him the same way in his reality.

“They probably feel fine, because just like you, they have a smart, amazing kid to call their own, and I’m sure they’re so happy to see her grow up to be a fine young lady,” Ben offered, squeezing the hand holding his, meeting Gwil’s gaze with a smile, and though the brunet still looked a bit unsure, he managed to return with a beam that reached his eyes.

“Alright prince charming, enough of that, I’m sure the people at Dominoes don’t want me sobbing through my order” Gwil declared, slipping their hands free and patting the top of Ben’s, slipping his phone out of his pocket, laptop reopened as he went through the menu.

“Dominoes? Aren’t we bougie tonight?” Ben chuckled, a bit surprised, if he was completely honest, given Gwil was apparently filming at the moment, one would assume it would be healthy all around.

“Yep, well, we gotta celebrate our boys first day the right way, nothin’ will make him happier than some of his favourite pizza,” Gwil explained, tapping in the number, Ben confused as to why he doesn’t just order online, before he realises they’re both not exactly the most tech-savvy people on earth. So, he’ll let it fly this time.

* * *

 

After ordering the pizza, Gwil decides to take Frankie out for a jog, Ben making the educated decision to keep well away from the dog if he could, so he chose to stay home, do his own thing, maybe have a crisis or two. Gwil looked a bit guilty as he walked the dog out, but he understood Ben’s hesitance, even walking past on a lead, the collie looked suspicious. Ben wasn’t sure how, but she knew.

Not sure what to do with himself, Ben decided to investigate the house, mindlessly wandering in and out of all the rooms, taking in all the awards for both Gwil and Ben, along with a fancy frame holding centre stage in the study, with Harley’s kindy graduation certificate in it. Even through the jealousy and fomo, Ben was glad that his life was so together in this universe, and he was glad that Harley had such amazing parents.

The pizza man managed to beat Gwil, and Ben didn’t miss the surprised look on the young guys face as ‘that drummer from that movie’ answered the door, the blond barely able to hold back his chuckles at the look on the guy’s face. He was a bit surprised when he didn’t ask for a photo, but Ben appreciated the professionalism nonetheless.

Almost as soon as that door was closed, Ben heard the soft tapping of little feet charging down the stairs, and before he knew it, Harley was running at him, grabbing at his pants and reaching up at the boxes, been chuckling too much to be able to tell him off for acting so wildly.

Luckily, it wasn’t much later that Gwil showed up, Ben hated to think how crazy Harley would’ve gotten if he’d had to wait any longer. The brunet taking Frankie directly out back, waving at the two to tuck in if they wanted to (and of course, Harley wanted to).

Ben decided to wait till Gwil sat down with them, the tall male pressing a kiss to his husbands and sons head as he passed them, making his way upstairs to change shirts. Ben turned his eyes to the little ginger across from him, Gwil’s theory seemingly working just fine, Harley happily tucking into his celebratory dinner, his little face tired, but fighting the feeling in favour of eating as much pizza as possible, and Ben couldn’t argue with that logic, if he’s honest.

Eventually, Gwilym meanders back downstairs, this time in a fresh shirt, and Ben can’t help but feel a bit sad, his previous shirt had stuck to him in all the right places, though he quickly quashes the thought, not wanting to get thirsty right in front of alternate Bens child.

Dinner went by fine, Gwil asking Harley questions that went relatively unanswered thanks to the continuous stream of pizza. Ben giggling at his husband’s determination, the brunet glaring and finally throwing in the towel, deciding instead to focus on his own dinner. Ben tries not to let the sweet domesticity of it all get too him, but even his stubborn determination can’t keep it out, and soon every bite tastes sour in his mouth.

Afterwards, Gwil takes Harley up for a quick bath, the boy tired out of his mind but in desperate need of a wash after running around the playground all day. Once again leaving Ben alone with his thoughts, and it certainly doesn’t help that every time he looks into the backyard, he finds himself staring directly at Frankie, the fluffy dog’s gaze unnervingly aware.

Very much missing his beagle now, the blond moving upstairs, feeling a little drowsy himself if he was completely honest, even with the looming fear of what was going to happen to him. It’s when he’s halfway to their room when he hears Gwil call him. Apparently, Harley wants to be read a story, and apparently, according to Gwil ‘he isn’t taking papa for an answer.’

Feeling very privileged, and a bit nervous, Ben makes his way into the room, his heart nearly melting at the sight of Harley tucked up in his sheets, the blond sitting carefully on the edge of the bed, before looking around for a book… and finding a pile of them… great.

“Papa book read the papa book” Harley instructed, looking at the pile, and Ben is confused a moment, before his eyes happen upon a certain book and everything clicks together.

Animal ark,  
of course there’s an animal ark book.

Trying to hold back his giggles at how bloody typical it is of Gwil to flex like this, Ben finds the bookmarked page and starts to read to the little ginger, it probably won’t take long for him to drift off, but Ben enjoys it anyway while he can. Putting on little voices and making faces every once and a while, Harley giggling up a storm each time.

But eventually, the giggles ebb, and Ben finds himself reading to a very much asleep Harley, the blond smiling to himself, before quietly putting the book away and making his way out of the room. He had to say, he could relate to Harley now, because he too felt sleepy as all hell, he was relieved he’d showered earlier, it meant he could pass out now instead of in the shower.

Upon entering the bedroom, he finds Gwil already sound asleep, a long day of worrying and floor fucking likely tiring him out pretty effectively. Ben looks over his sleeping face, and feels a sharp stab in his chest, the blond left gasping for breath a moment as he strips down to his boxer briefs, he’s scared, so damn scared, and when he hops under the sheets, he wraps himself in Gwilym’s arms, the brunet humming and pressing a quick kiss to his forehead, “I love you” he mumbles, voice gravelly with sleep and a bit uneven.

Swallowing thickly, Ben releases a long, shaky breath, eyes stinging as he curls up to Gwil’s side, gripping him like he’s about to disappear… _because he might disappear._

Ben finds himself angling his face up to Gwil’s, pressing a soft kiss to his lips, before the lead in his eyelids become too much, and he’s dragged into the world of unconsciousness. Hand’s still clutching Gwil’s shoulders like they’re the only thing keeping him alive.


	9. Look What They've Done To My Dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> ahh, here's the second last chapter yall, hope u enjoy

Ben wakes up to a faceful of kisses, and for a moment he forgets what happening, but then a all-encompassing wave of relief splashes over him, he’s still here, Gwil’s here, he’s here for the long run.

But then upon opening his eyes, that same wave crushed down onto him.

It isn’t Gwil,  
it’s Frankie

And when he looks around, his room is empty, barren, no Gwil, no Harley, nothing.

It feels like someone’s just ripped out his lungs, and he rolls onto his stomach, face burying into the pillow, he knows he should be relieved that everything is back to normal, but after yesterday, after having Gwil, after having a kid- a family, the loneliness felt choking, and it was as the waterworks started up that he heard his phone start buzzing on the nightstand.

Sniffling and inhaling deep, gulping breaths of air, he grabbed at the device, its screen lit up with a call from Gwil. Just seeing the name alone was enough to rip a sob from him. He declines the call, and things only get worse as he catches an eyeful of all the notifications. All he can think is ‘ _oh fuck, oh fuck what the hell’_ as he scrolls through them, his phone is full of message after message from Joe, Gwil, and even Lucy, along with a staggering number of missed calls from them all.

Dropping his phone onto his bed as it starts buzzing again, Ben struggles to his feet, stumbling into the bathroom just as he feels his stomach give a debilitating turn, luckily there was nothing to throw up, but he kept himself hunched over the sink, Frankie, the real Frankie, whining from next to him, paw scratching at his leg. “Oh god” he groans, splashing at his face, his insides still roiling and eye’s stinging if he so much as thinks of his phone. He doesn’t know what happened, but he can’t help but think, if he was in married Ben’s world, then married Ben…. _Fuck!_

It was that thought that had him sprinting out and snatching his phone up, scrolling down down down the long list of notifications, until he got to the first few messages, the first two from Gwil, and the third from Joe.

‘Ben, what was that about? Are you okay?’

‘You’re really worrying me, what’s going on?’

Then, from Joe

‘Gwil just called me, are you taking anything? Don’t make me come up there’

Ben was losing his mind, what the hell had happened? All he could feel was dread, pure dread as he scrolled through message after message of people asking if he was alright, and when all of a sudden, the phone rang again, he almost accidentally sent it flying across the room. It was Gwil, and for a moment he let it ring, planning not to answer.

But then, his curiosity gets the best of him, and he has to get to the bottom of whatever’s going on, so, trying his best to ignore the woozy feeling gnawing at him, he hesitantly pressed the answer button, and almost immediately, the phone exploded with noise. “Ben, fucking hell thank god you picked up, what have you been doing? I’ve been calling all night, you had me worried bloody sick. Are you on anything, did you hurt yourself? Jesus Ben, you show up at seven in the morning, yelling about some guy named Harley, and rings and all this other shit, you were hysterical. I was about to call the bloody ambulance, you were falling apart on my doormat, crying your eyes out and yelling at me, what the hell is going on?” Gwil hardly took a breath as he spoke, Ben’s face growing more and more horrified as he continued, the worst had happened, married Ben had woken up in his scummy, lonely house and freaked the fuck out by the sounds of it. God, he felt so bad for Gwil, and for Joe, who’d apparently been told along the lines of everything Gwilym just said, Ben ran his hands over his face.

“I’m so sorry, Gwil, I dunno what happened, I’m okay now, I’m fine,” he explained, his stomach churning and heart beating out of his chest, how the hell was he ever going to get back from this.

“Oh no, no, I’m not letting you off like that, you can’t pull a stunt like that and expect me to get over it, I’m getting in my car now, see you soon Ben, don’t you dare move” Gwil announced, and the blond almost threw up all over himself, this could not happen, no, he had to avoid Gwil, for the rest of time, he needed to flee the country, change his name again, and work for a sheep herder the rest of his life.

Before he could argue anymore, Gwil had hung up, and Ben was left speechless, and freaking out. He had to run, he had to escape, hide out somewhere else, anywhere else, whatever he did, he could not face Gwil, not after what he’d just been told. As far as Gwil knew, by the sounds of it, was that Ben was on some hard drugs or something, and if he were honest, Ben kinda preferred that story over the one he actually had.

Gradually becoming more and more panicked as the minutes passed, Ben considered jumping out the window at least 6 times, Frankie whining and confused at her owner’s odd behaviour, but following him around the house anyway. Ben wasn’t too sure what he was doing, because the logical side knew he should stay put and try to work his way out of this somehow, but then the other part of him thought moving to a small town in the Scottish hinterland was the best solution.

Somehow, the logical side won out, and he decided to at least try and come up with a game plan for Gwil’s interrogation, because he sure as hell couldn’t give him the truth. Ben groaned, drawing a blank on the excuses front, he supposed all that was left was to let all his emotions out in one big sobbing heap, because lord knows he was feeling a lot right now.

The knock at the door was followed a few seconds later by the sound of Gwil forcing the door open, his voice distressed as he called out for the blond, Ben swallowing thickly, his heart hammering into his ribcage. He knows it’s going to hurt, seeing Gwil, seeing the different look in his eyes, no love, just a cold friendzone that may as well be a bullet to the brain.

He’s right, because the second he steps foot into the same room as the brunet, it’s like he’s just been punched in the guts. It’s only made worse by the fact that Gwil’s face turns from concerned to relieved, and then Ben’s wrapped in his arm’s, the brunet whispering about how worried he’d been into Ben’s shoulder.

They stand like that a moment, holding each other, and Ben knows he’s crying, and he hates it, but the fact that this is the closest he’ll ever get to what he had yesterday absolutely kills him. When they pull back, the blond tries his best to wipe his eyes dry, but of course that doesn’t work, and he can see Gwil’s little platonic heart break.

“D’you remember anything yesterday? Anything at all?” Gwil asked, voice soft, and his thumb even softer as it drags over Ben’s cheek, a move that has the blond shocked quiet, Ben shaking his head in response, he’s so very confused, but Gwil’s leaning in and he can’t bring himself to move.

Their lips are centimetres apart when he says “too bad, you helped me figure out something I should’ve realised ages ago…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, jus to clarify, im suggesting that in his terrified, husbandless and childless, hysterical state, au Ben kissed Gwil and then continued to freak out about being in the wrong fucking au. But, by kissing gwil and going off about family and wedding rings and all that, he helped gwil figure out his feelings for real Ben. hope that makes sense, but i know yall wont mind if it doesnt


	10. Just Gimme, One Man One Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short and sweet happy ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disc: If you are or know anyone mentioned in this fic I urge you to turn away now!
> 
> alight, kind of last chapter ( i say kinda because i want to add a funny one shot at some point) this is really short by my standards and it exists purely to kind of tie off the story and remove any possible cliffhangers, so hope yall enjoy, ill hopefully be getting back to the benjamina series tomorrow!!

They were kissing, and Ben swore his heart forgot how to function for moment, and if it wasn’t for Gwil’s hand gripping his hip, he likely would’ve collapsed. He was surprised at the kiss, and not only because it came out of nowhere, but because it was so different to what the other Gwil had been like, where yesterdays had been sure, and insistent, this one was soft, a little tentative, almost like he thought Ben would actually deny him. Ben knew that was likely the last thing that would ever happen, he’s pretty sure that ‘saying no to Gwilym Lee’ is a foreign concept in his brain. Shaking off the thought, the blond focuses entirely of the feeling of Gwil’s mouth against his, the soft brush of their tongues, the rub of his stubble, the way his hand slipped lower to cup his jaw, tilting it in just the right spot for a deeper kiss.

When they pulled away, Ben pressed forward, falling against the other’s chest, his arms wrapping around Gwil’s waist, hugging the taller male to him. He still felt a roiling uneasiness in his stomach, like he didn’t trust the powers that be to not fuck him over again. “You sure you’re alright? I’m serious Ben, you really scared me, seeing you like that, crying your eyes out and shouting about all these things I had no idea about…” the brunet’s voice grew heavy, like just recalling the events was painful for him, and Ben felt a stab of anguish, guilt settling into his bones.

“I’m genuinely fine, and like I said earlier, I don’t know what happened either, and I’m so fucking sorry for freaking you out so much…. But if I prompted you to…. Kiss me, like that, then I- I can’t disagree” he mumbled, skin tingling with nerves, he felt like Gwil might still reject him, even after that. They’re both silent a moment, before Ben’s curiosity finally gets the better of him and he just has to know, “did I say anything interesting?” his face was stuck in a grimace, preparing for the worst.

“Well, you didn’t really say anything, you mostly… screamed, asking me ‘where Harley is’ and ‘why I took my ring off’… you looked so confused when I didn’t understand you, looked like your whole world came down… then ya kissed me, and when I froze up, you took off, couldn’t find you the rest of the day. How the bloody hell can you not remember any of that?” Ben felt a pang of jealousy at the mention of other Ben kissing Gwil… but then he drops it, he did way worse to other Gwil, he can’t complain. Especially considering the fact that it got him here, in Gwil’s arms, with Gwil’s lips on his just moments before.

He felt stupid, even though there was no way he could’ve known what had happened, and luckily for his emotional wellbeing, upon seeing the look on his face, Gwil stepped down, offering a comforting smile. “Alright, I believe you, but if you think I’m leaving you alone today, then you’re dead wrong, because a) I won’t be able to sleep tonight if I don’t convince myself you’re okay, and b) because we have a lot of time to make up for.”

Then they were kissing again, and Ben was so here for this, so here for this reality, where Gwil really does love him, and Frankie is normal, and where he now has a whole new relationship to explore himself.

Pulling back a moment, his hands already thumbing at the material of Gwil’s sweater “sorry, just double checking; Joe’s not actually going to come up here, right? Like he’s not going to bash down the door while we’re… busy?” whilst you’d assume Joe had been joking, it was Joe they were talking about, and that man was an absolute wildcard, even when he was a few hours from Ben’s house.

Gwil looked considering a moment “I mean… he probably shouldn’t be…” he trailed off, looking blankly over Ben’s shoulder a moment, before a flash of uneasiness filled his eyes “on second thought, I better call him real quick, tell him everything is under control.”

The brunet then pulled his phone out of his pocket, tapping away as he looked for Joe’s number, but Ben was growing quickly restless, and as Gwil pulled the phone to his ears, the blond smirked, dropping to his knees (because the one thing that the universes had in common, was that apparently, all Gwil’s couldn’t resist short blond’s named Ben Hardy) and smacking away the hands that came to move him away, the taller male looking alarmed, and about to say something, when Joe picked up.

“Hey Joe! I just wanted to let you know that I’m with Ben, and that things are all go-OD!”

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to drop a comment/request down below or hmu on my [tumblr](https://hardleeharlee.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Also sorry for calling their kid Harley but I couldn't help myself, a cute name within a joke


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